I know what you’re thinking and I fairly understand your dilemma of your nosy parents being up your arse in all things you do. At most times you’ll feel like you’re deprived of the freedom you deserve; like, c’mon mom, it’s not like I’m spending your money in all my shits. Time and again, the pressure slowly builds up and the friction between you and your parents will just eventually get worst (well, at least according to your assumptions). At one point in time you will demand for your own space and will certainly go on a reevaluation drama of your life over and over again until you find a fix to the issue at hand.
“Kaya ko naman na eh!”
Yes, there’s no question to it. With your good paying job and promising career, awesome group of friends, and the other support team you have that got’yer back; I’m pretty sure you can manage to live on your own without being pressured to be home when the clock strikes 12 just like Cinderella because you anticipate a crazy round of interview the morning after. It’s a no-brainer. Moving out is the best option if you want a 100% independent life without the complications of living with your folks.
But hey, hold that thought a bit coz you might wanna double check first before jumping to your conclusion.
First, make sure that you are not emotionally driven. It can be a bit tricky and it may take a while to understand, but emotions play a critical role in the decision process. Yes, mostly, they are the reason why everything else won’t make sense in the long run. You may be having a tough time dealing with your parents and understanding where they’re coming from most of the time, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that they are bullying you or taking over your life. They are simply trying to be good parents; which means to say that they just gotta do what they have to do.
Moving out is a major milestone in anyone’s life. It’s not a decision you can just make overnight or something you can decide on to do because of the circumstances you are faced with. Think hard about it and rethink it over and over again if you need to. Are you just being emotional or is it already a logical thing to do in order for you to toughen up by learning things on your own?
Second, YOUR STRATEGIES. By that I mean, YOUR DECIDING FACTORS! I know you already have a stable job and a stable income, but taking on a responsibility requires so much more. Are you financially ready? Where are you staying exactly? Is it accessible to public transport? Is there a hospital nearby in case of any emergencies? Are the roads wide enough for a firetruck to pass through? Is there a nearby police station? Is it safe to walk around the area in the wee hours of the morning just in case you’ll go home late?
I’m pretty sure there must be a reason why your parents are up your arse most of the time aside from them being over protective of you. In one way or another whether you admit it or not, they are seeing something that needs to be changed to make a better person outta you. In most cases, to site one very specific example; perhaps you are spending too much and not saving enough? Yes I understand so well that it’s your hard earned money, but will your earnings be enough to live up to your lifestyle or will there be a drastic change that you’ll find a hard time coping up with?
Third, your laundry. Who will wash your clothes? Iron, fold, dry? There’s again an easy answer to this one, but trust me; you still don’t know how it feels to run out of nice clothes to wear. There may be a laundry shop near your place, but they will not give you a similar service you get at home. Most of their rates are unreasonable and the time they take to finish doing your dirty clothes is just unreasonable. More than that, they really don’t care about how much your clothes are as long as it fits the washing machine together with all the other clothes of people you don’t even know.
Fourth, FOOD! It’s time to say goodbye to good food; the kind you have in your house everyday. Eating out is a lot more expensive and it’s also equally expensive to cook if you’re alone (it’s also the saddest thing that can ever happen to you). The only way for you to actually save up on food is to eat in your neighborhood carinderia or from the canteen in your office building. The quality however and all the other extra calories (and MSG) you’ll get from these budget meals are just over the top. Say goodbye to quality and say hello to consumerism with your limited food choices.
Lastly, BILLS, BILLS, AND A LOT OF BILLS! I know you’ve done your homework already by computing all these, budgeting, and checking if you can really really pull off an independent life, but all your computations wouldn’t matter the moment they actually start arriving, monthly! There will be a lot of adjustments on your part and when I say a lot, I mean A LOT! Your bills will serve both as your lesson and achievement. This may sound funny now, but you will eventually realize that being responsible about yourself and your life is not as easy as it seems to be.
In conclusion, moving out is only fun when you think about it. It only gets serious when you start to delve in the little challenges that come with it. It is something that will determine the life ahead of you and the opportunities you’ll encounter as a result of the different lessons you’ll come across with. How you’ll eventually grow up, change, and mature as a result of the decisions you make along the way will depend on your flexibility as a person to recalibrate and adjust when necessary. Things will be a bit surprising during your first months living alone, or maybe your first 2 months or three, but you’ll surely get a hang of it. If you decide to move out; make sure that you have all the support of people around you most especially your family. Living alone is not easy and living with a heavy heart doesn’t help at all. Before deciding, make sure that you are ready because eventhough you always have an option to go back to your parents’ house; I don’t think it will give you a sense of fulfilment that you’re finally responsible enough to know what’s right, what’s wrong, and where your life is actually heading…